Who wears a wallet chain?!
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
