I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
