Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
