He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
