She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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