I look better un-naked...
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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