That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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