it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
