Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
