Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
