This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
false alarm, still single
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
