Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
