Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
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