That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
We are all done wearing pants today
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
