I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
