She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
