Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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