Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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