none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
