if you like me you must not know who I am
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
what day is it and did you see me today?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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