Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
