He is such a slut. More and more my type.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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