yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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