I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
