We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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