you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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