i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Randomize
