you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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