My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize