belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
