You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize