My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
