HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
