fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Randomize
