Pregnant stripper...not hot.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize