Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(760): View more from California

No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.

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(256): View more from Alabama

every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now

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(419): View more from Ohio

watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced

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(818): View more from California

remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,

(702): View more from Nevada

Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.

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(713): View more from Texas

Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car

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(504): View more from Louisiana

Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.

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(213): View more from California

I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus

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(906): View more from Michigan

How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.

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