and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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