they said they heard you say put it in my butt
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
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