Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
