i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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