put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
You can't just leave with hair like that
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Randomize
