If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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