is your mom at the bar?
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
