just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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