Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
