Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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