Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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