What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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