Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize
