we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
